Featured Story

hooded chihuahua

Make Shitloads of Money Online Without Chihuahuas

Dear minions, If you want to conquer the world, it helps to make shitloads of money online so you can pay for things like sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their frickin' heads. The problem is, I bet you've already tried making money online... I bet you've failed miserably... I bet you've convinced yourself there must be some logical explanation for your … [Read More...]

Featured Story

Featured Story

Featured Story

The lump of meat inside your head, aka - the brain

Learn to use that Lump of Meat Inside your Head

Dear minions, Everyone seems to have this useless lump of meat inside their head. They carry it around everywhere they go. ... and worst of all, the lump of meat is a freeloader. It asks for stuff all the time. It wants videos, gossip, and news updates. It wants food, … [Read More...]

Hey man, are you sure it wasn't a chicken?

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Dear minions, Listen, we can have a whole debate about chickens and eggs. ... like, of course the first chicken had to come out of an egg so obviously the egg came first. But, then everybody gets bent out of shape because who laid that egg? Wasn't it a … [Read More...]

Best smelling Google Nexus 5 screen protector

Best Smelling Google Nexus 5 Screen Protector

Dear minions, Listen, I've smelled a lot of screen protectors in my day, but the Spigen Google Nexus 5 Crystal Clear Screen Protector is by far the best smelling screen protector of all! Not only does the Spigen Google Nexus 5 Screen Protector smell great, but it also … [Read More...]

Sheep Traffic Jam in the Snow

Holy Shit it’s Snowing

Dear minions, Let's skip the small talk and get straight to the point... HOLY SHIT IT'S SNOWING! I could have built an evil headquarters inside a volcano like Dr. Evil, I bet that would have been nice... Or I could have built a fort in the jungle with a pit of … [Read More...]

Very happy cat ate some pills

How to Make Lolcats – Step by Step Guide

Dear minions, Today, I'm going to teach you how to make lolcats. In order to conquer the world, you need the ability to communicate with the primitive lifeforms you're hoping to enslave. Unfortunately earthlings have devolved to the point where lolcats have become the … [Read More...]

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