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640px-Confucius_Sculpture,_Nanjing

27 Confucius Say Quotes that are Actually Funny

Dear minions, The following is the ultimate top 27 list of Confucius say quotes. ... there are thousands of Confucius say quotes out there, but most suck. I've removed all the stupid ones and 93% of the sexist ones. Even all the ones about farts. What's left is the Ultimate Top 27 list... A list of the most witty, intelligent, and actually funny Confucius say … [Read More...]

Featured Story

Featured Story

Featured Story

Lego Porn

How the Rhombus is Destroying the Porn Industry

Dear minions, I hate the rhombus. Seriously. You just have to look at a rhombus to know it's a terrible shape. It's kind of like a square, but wtf, it's always crooked. And worst of all... ... the rhombus is destroying the porn industry. Err... How is the … [Read More...]

It's your time for greatness, be not afraid.

It’s Your Time for Greatness

Dear minions, It's YOUR time for greatness. It's YOUR moment to walk into the spotlight. It's YOUR opportunity to have everything you ever wanted. ... And all YOU have to do is join the World Domination Newsletter. Get the FREE World Domination … [Read More...]

Goodlife Fitness Water Bottle

Not Safe to Drink from GoodLife Fitness Water Bottle

Dear GoodLife, I recently acquired one of your red GoodLife Fitness water bottles. I was eager to quench my thirst at my next workout when I discovered to my dismay it was impossible to use this bottle securely. I've attached pictures demonstrating the problem... Here is a … [Read More...]

HostGator, the Smooth Criminal

HostGator Coupon Code for Super Villains and Overlords

Dear minions, As you know, I'm the most notorious super villain of the internet. ... I'm also a self-proclaimed evil overlord. The point is, I've found a way to make less than one-hundred billion dollars in thirty days or more by operating an evil website about world … [Read More...]