I think you’re really going to enjoy my Evil Sales Pitch Series.
… of course, READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!
Because a series this good, you know it’s going to be DANGEROUS…
I’ve got some more WARNINGS below, but if you’re feeling ballsy you can just throw yourself in here and get on with it. Hey man, what’s the worst that could happen?
My sales pitches are so evil they’ll make you spend all your money!
… I’ve got to make one-hundred billions dollars somehow, right?
Well, the best way for me to make money is for me to take your money.
… but don’t worry!
Once you read my Evil Sales Pitch Series you’ll want nothing but to give me all your money because I recommend products that are so insanely good, so incredibly irresistible, so awesomely hip, you just can’t resist purchasing them.
Look, here’s some examples:
- Best Smelling Google Nexus 5 Screen Protector
- How to Save Money on Books – Buy the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy!
- Kikkerland Head Massager Greatest thing since Processed Sliced Cheese
Are these deals real?!
All the stuff I recommend is sold on Amazon and shipped right to your door!
I have to do a lot of research to find these deals.
I have to read a lot of reviews, test-the-things-out myself, and even sometimes use them in my schemes for world domination.
I recommend nothing but the best for my minions, not because I care at-all about you guys, but because I want you to come back and buy more stuff!
… because when you buy something I recommend on Amazon, Amazon pays me a tiny commission!
And once I make one-hundred billion dollars, well, that’s when I’m going to launch my most grandiose plan for world domination of all…
Hey, what’s this grandiose plan for world domination you’ve got?
Listen, my plan for world domination is totally out-of-this world!
I’d love to tell you all about the juicy details, but first, why not take-a-little-peak at my Evil Sales Pitch Series…
… just a peak.
You know, to find out what all the fuss is about…